If I'd Been God

And really been thinking!

If I'd been God,
way back when,
if in fact
he created everything
in the air,
in the sea,
and growing and crawling 
all around me...

there's so much
I would have never created
and even more 
I'd never have allowed
to be invented.

Mondays,
would have never been,
nor Thursdays,
I'd have had us go
straight from Wednesdays 
into weekends!

You'd never have to worry
about clowns 
nor snakes
nor knives 
nor skunks or nunchucks,
they wouldn't exist!

And had I really been thinking,
I'd have never created
fossil fuels, either.
I would have turned
dead, rotting trees
and dinosaours
into bottomless reservoirs 
of pristine water, 
no need to purify 
or bottle it,
just swallow it!

I would have never created
religion nor retribution,
cancer nor constipation,
near-sightedness, farsightedness,
nor forgetfulness,
jealousy nor envy.

I would have never 
allowed the invention
of AK- or AR- anything,
of the KKK, 
of cluster bombs,
no, make that any bombs,
and maybe no NASCAR, either! 

Despite its violence,
I would have allowed
the invention of American football,
college and the NFL,
so I could play 
Monday morning quarterback
and nit-pick my handiwork,
if in fact I created it all,
but, again, I'd be playing QB
on Tueday mornings!